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Captain’s Log: Preparing for battle

March 15, 2015 | By | Add a Comment
Captain's Log logo designed by Kyle "Captain" IsaacsCaptain’s Log

As I have said before in these random articles, I have never finished first in a beard competition. It is a minor goal of mine to eventually accomplish but I’m not overzealous about it as there are way more important and real things to worry myself with day to day. But after every competition I find myself at, whether as a judge or competitor, I have the same side effects. Making mental notes for how to perform better the next go around, notes not just for me, but my friends/ teammates as well.

Something as simple as your stage attire can affect you greatly in a facial hair competition. Especially when you’re in the longer categories of bearding. I have a very dark beard (for the most part). I also usually only wear black shirts which causes my beard to blend in. The blending is only worsened by the usually low stage lighting at most of the competitions I have attended. White makes my ends look sparse and thinner, so where is the damn middle ground? A neutral gray or a Kelly green go best with my beard and still don’t look out of place with my personality. Don’t forget the personality aspect – you still have to feel comfortable out there. Find your color and own the moment.

Product usage is touch and go. Some competitions have rules about what you can and can’t use, what qualifies as a styling aid and all that jazz. I have found that for my full natural attempts I prefer a light balm. Nothing too shiny and nothing with a lot of hold, and a mild scent that’s not overpowering. In my opinion there is nothing wrong with that in the full natural or short beard categories when used in moderation. For the moustaches though please don’t use excess wax because it looks bad and I won’t judge overly visible wax well.

Oddly, one of the last things I can find to talk about for this topic is your stage presence. I have said too much before and caused people to go overboard with this. It is ultimately a facial hair competition before anything. However, sometimes being a showman (or woman) can help give you an edge. Costumes are cool and creative but should be secondary to the overall facial hair. If you have some spiel to do on stage keep it short and sweet. If you can’t win it with what you got on your face then roll on and humbly applaud the winner. Consider it a learning experience and keep your mouth shut until you’re in the car with your support crew. I will always judge the chops, beard or stache above the costume and rants. Nothing wrong with putting on a show, just use your damn head man!

That being said I am honing in my newest strategy adjustments and patiently awaiting my next competitive appearance while planning and aiding my teammates with their next attempts as well. I’m always looking forward to seeing how the others have stepped their games up all in the name of the competitive world of facial hair.


Kyle “Captain” Isaacs is the head of Beard & Loathing in Kentucky. Find him on Instagram @beard_captain.

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Category: Captain's Log, Featured

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