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Captain’s Log: Another way of looking at it

March 12, 2015 | By | Add a Comment

Captain's Log logo designed by Kyle "Captain" Isaacs

Captain’s Log

I guess I have been to my fair share of competitions. Not as far and wide as some, but if you have to brag about that kind of stuff you must suffer from a lack of self-esteem. For the most part, a lot of these competitions are the same. I mean the idea and skeletal structure are very similar. Out of the gate there is usually a charity, sometimes you have heard of it, other times you might have to give it a google.

There are various categories, sometimes less and other times too damn many to understand. Registration tables, vendor booths, beers and bands. Look left and see “that guy” making a drunk fool of himself, look right and see a local “beard legend” being heard and seen. Don’t misunderstand me, I’m not bitter by any means. However, there are some aspects of the competitive side of bearding that could use some change.

Now no matter how many categories a comp has it always seems like somebody will feel left out, and they will probably take it way too personal, feeling cheated or forced into a losing situation, even when that’s not remotely the case nine out of ten times. What if we maybe set a minimum number of specific categories for all competitions? Perhaps that’s way too much structure being thrown at a group of people who usually rebel from such. I can’t answer this question. Something like that might make all competitions too mirrored and cookie cutter for any kind of enjoyment. If you agree, that’s fine, if not that is ok as well. I didn’t write this to start any revolutions nor did I write it to cater to an overly sensitive crowd.

Take my team for example. We have held a competition annually for the past four years. This year we have elected not to compete in our own comp. We feel it can be potentially troublesome and created unwanted conflict. We decided this after attending the Showdown at the Southern Gates competition in Nashville. The Metropolitan Pognotrophy Society holds their competition for the other teams. They run the stage and registration and ensure that people are entertained. I can respect the hell out of this concept. Now, on the other hand if your competition allows your own members to compete I’m not in disagreement with that. It’s your call. I’m sure it will remain a fair and honest situation.

I didn’t get into this gig because of the competitions. I didn’t know about the comps for the first two months of my team’s existence. We just wanted to hang out and do community based stuff together while celebrating facial hair. That is more rewarding to me that some trinket showing a first place finish. Not trying to demean that though, I’m sure if I ever place first I will be honored and excited. I’m just saying that representing my team and my hometown is a proud moment for me no matter what the outcome is. Hanging out with other teams and catching up with friends is always a good time. Let’s keep it classy and fun. Things will change in time for better, and maybe even for worse sometimes. I don’t have any solutions to offer, but you might…


Kyle “Captain” Isaacs is the head of Beard & Loathing in Kentucky. Find him on Instagram @beard_captain.

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